BUTCH / FEMME INFORMATIVE CARRD
Disclaimer: None of the information presented is written by me, everything belongs to ”Butch Femme Love” via Tumblr. I have simply compiled the information in a Carrd for easier access.
Please visit their website for deeper insight about butches and femmes!
“What is butch/femme?”
“Can non-lesbians call themselves butch/femme?”
“Is futch a valid identity?”
“Are butches only allowed to date femmes and vice versa?”
”WHAT IS BUTCH / FEMME?”
Butch and femme are historical identities that used to be predominant in lesbian communities, originating in working class lesbian bars of the early 20th century in the united states. They were used to communicate to other lesbians about what kind of relationship dynamic they were seeking.
Butch lesbians are gender nonconforming and reject traditional femininity. Femme lesbians reclaim femininity, but subvert it by making it for women only instead of for men.
They are essentially lesbian genders, created by lesbians for lesbians, to facilitate a relationship dynamic in the absence of the traditional gender roles of men and women. This does not mean it is replicating heterosexuality; butches are not comparable to straight men and femmes are not comparable to straight women.
Butch/femme are NOT only about aesthetics, although presentation is a key part of the identities. It is not a spectrum of masculine to feminine presentation, attitude, or hobbies. They are each cohesive, distinct identities that act in tandem with each other.
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”Can non-lesbians call themselves butch / femme?”
Butch/femme is a relationship dynamic used between woman-loving women, in the complete absence of men. Anyone in or seeking a relationship with men should not use butch/femme. For this reason, it is primarily a lesbian identity. However, bisexual women have always interacted with butches and femmes in lesbian spaces and are a part of the history too.
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“Is futch a valid identity?”
Butch and femme are two specific historical lesbian identities, not two opposite ends of a spectrum. Not all lesbians fit into butch/femme and that’s okay and normal, but “futch” is neither butch nor femme and is not a specific and complex historical identity in the same way. The promotion of “futch” as a legitimate identity leads to misconceptions about what butch/femme really means.
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“Are butches only allowed to date femmes and vice versa?”
Butches can date butches and femmes can date femmes, they did so even in the time periods that butch/femme culture was at its height, although much less commonly. However, it is untrue to its history to think that the butch and femme identities were not inherently tied to the other, as two halves of a whole, and that they were constructed specifically for butches to seek femmes and vice versa, even though not everyone adhered strictly to this.
Butches and femmes that are into women more like themselves will relate differently to butch/femme history than traditional butches and femmes, as many butches and femmes describe their identity as specifically depending on their attraction to and interactions with their counterpart. There is nothing wrong with being a butch who dates butches or a femme who dates femmes as long as this history is recognized and respected.